Sonnet 1

A sad and empty color scheme of gray
Portraits the landscape being framed by pains
I peer out my window, it fades away
Visions of lovers past in present gains

Refusing to open my stubborn eyes
To colors and sounds of the world outside
Holidays are near, but my heart still sighs
A vast hole where the warmth used to reside

This nostalgic selfishness breaths my thoughts
Leads to a comforting place inside me
Where there is hope to massage these knots
Dark dissipates into where it can see

Expansive space for new creative light
Grays and golds now take on a different sight

Buddha Series Art Show

Thank you to all of my friends and family that attended.

Artist Statement

“The word Buddha in Sanskrit means “to be awakened” to a primordial reality of radiant compassion and self-existing wisdom. When expressed in art, Buddhas are not objects of worship, but mirrors of our innermost beings, icons of the journey from ignorance to illumination.” (Baker, Celestial Gallery). “The Buddha Series” is where I use the ancient teachings of yoga and Buddhist philosophy, and combine them with making art. I start with different images of the Buddha. The images range from those in classical Buddhist texts to contemporary laughing Buddha statues. Each new image and context sets the tone and energy of the painting. I use charcoal and spray paint to offset the marks of the acrylic paint. The image of the Buddha stays until I have worked into the painting so much that any traces of the figure are covered in layers of linear marks. Coming from an athletic background, I am physical with the application of paint. I place the canvas on the floor so I can walk around my painting and create active lines. Some of the paintings are playful and use dream-like interpretations of the Buddha, while others take on a serious undertone of contemplations of Buddhist philosophy and Tantric Buddhist meditation practices. My influences are Willem De Kooning, Kandinsky, and Francis Bacon for their line work, compositions, and use of color. I am also inspired by the teachings of His Holiness the Dalai Lama, Pema Chodron, Deepak Chopra, Robert Thurman, Shri Kishna Pattabhi Jois, Shri Krishnamacharya, Christopher Baxter, and the Tibetan-style mandala and tangka paintings of Romio Shrestha. I want the viewer to put behind the concerns of their everyday life and ponder their innermost potential: the possibility of happiness and spiritual freedom. As the Bhagavad Gita says, “As I curve back within myself and manifest different forms, I realize that I am not in the universe, but the universe is in me; I am not in this body, this body is in me; I am not this mind, the mind is in me. And as I curve back within myself, I create the experience of mind, of body, of the universe and all of these infinite realms. That’s enlightenment: to know that the entire universe is a projection of my own being and I create within myself the texture and fabric of all that exists.”

Venice

Land of sunken pride and beauty Nature overtaking man Reclaiming what is hers Mystic crossings and cold footsteps A sense of still and unease City of the water strictly for Poseidon's pleasure Barely visible another era Her beauty fleeting In moments caught between breaths Steady gaze on lovers present Speaking in soft tongues As not to awaken his majesty Hand in hand we dream of all those who have walked before With masks a plenty stripped of identity Cold footsteps on the same cobble floor Shielding faces as not to awaken the night Or to become the night if chosen Mystic river flows life into these walls Only sound is my heart beating City of paradox dancing through my daydreams Are you alive or dead Quiet or loud On the verge of creation or destruction Bright colored buildings and dark eyes Is time stopped or fast forward Is it all for love or greed A silent whimper of lovers past Ruins of heroic past echoes misery upon ears The language sounds of sweet nectar Melting over every new lips Hypnotizing into a trance Watching the fog flow in and out of cracks Consuming where the water yearns to go Foreboding the eventual demise With a naked beginning Stripped of the ghosts that haunt the streets A gust of wind swept away Her beauty now under the icy blue-green Still can be heard in between the breaths we take

Wellness as a Way of Life

Discovery Yoga "Wellness as a Way of Life" 9/21-22

We can make our minds so like still water that beings gather about us, that they may see, it may be, their own images, and so live for a moment with a clearer, perhaps even with a fiercer life because of our quiet.

-William Butler Yeats

Christopher Baxter led this two day workshop on wellness. We discussed what is the goal of yoga? Ultimately all being want to be happy. We so often think of yoga and wellness in this sense of asana or physical practices when the goal is really for us to be well so that we may bring that to others.

So, how do we get happy? Contrary to Western belief happiness does not lie at the bottom of a late' or deep within our TV's. To not just be happy, but to remain happy the Buddha teaches that we must realize this:

1. All things are impermanent.

2. Our lives are short, restricted, and unsatisfying.

The cure is through the path. Bringing in three categories of wellness:

1. Body & Breath

Ex: physical respiration, yoga, fitness, walking, diet. Physical sheath (Anamyakosha)

2. Energy & Emotions

Ex: connection to mental state, feelings, sensations, moods, stress. Most suffering happens in the emotional body.

3. Mind & Mindfulness

Ex: Buddhist & mind training practices, alertness, energy, attention.

* All are interconnected, together=wellness. Root in awareness.

What has worked for me:

Body & Breath

• yoga asanas
• biking
• running/ walking
• posture awareness
• breath work
• painting
• teaching

Resources:

Yoga for Wellness- Gary Kraftsow

Yoga as Medicine- Timothy McCall

International Association Yoga Therapists IAYT

Energy & Emotions

• journaling
• painting
• meditation
• research
• support from family
• exercise
• cognitive therapy (awareness of reality)
• mantras/ affirmations
• contemplation of the divine

Resources:

Emotional Intelligence- Daniel Goleman

Path with the Heart- Jack Kornfeild

Eastern Body Western Mind- Anodea Judith

Writing Down to Bones- Natalie Goldberg

Mind & Mindfulness

• Tantric and Buddhist mind training techniques
• reading
• mantra meditation
• workshops/ research
• teaching
• listening
• chanting/ singing
• painting
• writing

Resources:

Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction- Jon Cabot-Zinn

Start Where You Are- Pema Chodrun

Joyful Wisdom- Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche

Now to find a holistic wellness plan for you:

Think of the things you are already doing in these categories that are working. Then make a separate list of where you would like to go next.

Think about what is out of balance in your life? What are the effects? What is needed to balance?

Then make a plan. Set goals.

Something daily, weekly, monthly, seasonally, and annually that you can make a part of your life to create wellness.

Wellness as a way of life. Yoga as a core set of lifetime skills. Building on the foundation of yoga. Deepen your own awareness through direct experience. Expand into other applications and complimentary disciplines. Integrate the expanded, enhanced awareness into your services to others.

-Christopher Baxter

Thank you Christopher and all of the other wonderful people who were apart of this workshop.

Light, love, and energy is contagious.

Global Mala

Global Mala at lululemon 9/19 Dennis and Kathy Lang

Global Mala was an idea from Shiva Rea to honor the UN International Day of Peace. During this event yoga studios around the world dedicate 108 sun salutations to peace.

Dennis and Kathy led us through 4 rounds of 27 sun salutations including special dedications for each round. These two teachers have inspired me for years and I am thankful of spending those two hours with them and surrounded by friends at lululemon.

Lokaha Samasta Sukhino Bhavantu

(May all beings everywhere find happiness and peace)

Om Shanti Shanti Shanti- Peace Peace Peace

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Yoga Anatomy with David Keil

8/28-30th at Yoga Life

This workshop was a lot more than learning fancy anatomy words. Yoga Anatomy is very important to know and I learned a lot about the body. David also shared stories of his experiences of being an ashtangi and training with Pattabhi Jois in Mysore, India. Here are some quotes and interesting facts from the weekend:

• Everything in the body is wrapped in connective tissue
• The body works as a Tensegrity Model- the tension maintains the integrity of the structure
• 75 to 85% of body weight is muscle mass
• PNF technique- when a muscle contracts the opposite muscle is shut off
• Yoga is balancing opposing energies. Example in the foot: A foot print has a Mula or grounding quality, while the arch has a Uttianda or uplifting quality
• "Yoga is the ultimate freedom" Iyengar
• Too much tension in the hips leads to knee pain
• "We are subtle to gross"
• "Don't fear- have faith and trust" Guruji
• Both sides of the pelvis are independent
• There is more movement in women than men in the sacroiliac joint
• Yoga is a means to connect the body by taking awareness inside
• Every pose has a physical and energetic benefit
• A "pop" noise in the joint (hips especially) is caused by pressure changes
• The center of gravity is on top of the sacrum and is the main circulation point of energy
• The breath, or prana, controls circulation and leads to bandha
• If you have back pain- strengthen core and open the front body
• Goal of yoga- create length and space
• "Always be a student"
• When we breathe six vertebrae move apart
• A soft tissue injury won't hurt during practice but after when cool
• Scar tissue builds 30 minutes after you tear connective tissue
• Stretch after you tear something so scar tissue build up doesn't occur

The energy of the group at Yoga Life was great and so much fun to practice together on Sunday. David Keil was wonderful and I hope to practice with him again in the future.

Thank you Thank you Thank you

"Everything Exists on the Tip of a Wish"

I recently came across this saying when a Buddhist nun was asked how one pursues Buddhism. Her reply was, "Everything exists on the tip of a wish". Just thinking about Buddhism is the first step. Then you will find yourself seeking out like ideas and eventually things just fall into place.

I find this concept to be a consistent one in my life. It always shows up whenever I need it, and is ever inspiring. I am so thankful for my family and teachers always encouraging me to make new goals and find ways of achieving them.

We are in control of our lives. What we put out into the world will surely find its way back. By creating positive thoughts we can change our lives to help others. "Everything exists on the tip of a wish".

1. Dream it

2. Think about it

3. Talk about it

4. Make realistic steps towards it

5. Visualize every aspect of how it will feel when achieved

6. Enroll others

7. Hold yourself accountable

His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Sorry about the blurry photo (we weren't supposed to be taking pictures)
Waiting outside in the cold, rainy streets of New York to see H.H. at the Beacon Theatre

It has taken me a while to comprehend all the events in New York and leading up to me being in New York. It all went so fast. It started when my teacher Christopher introduced me to Buddhism in a yoga teacher training session. I became fascinated with the Buddhist philosophy and ideals. I started reading Pema Chodron's "Start Where You Are" and "The Art of Happiness" by H.H. Christopher talked about his experience visiting the Dalai Lama and I knew it was something I must do in this lifetime. Shortly after I set the goal I was contacted by my friend Krya in New York saying I must come soon. I am have never been one to say no to an adventure, soon after I had my ticket to the big city. I was looking up the Dalai-man's sched. and found a date in New York at the same time I would be there! I was so excited I was running around telling everyone!! It didn't even feel real.

I arrived in New York and it rained the entire time. On the day H.H. was speaking at the Beacon Theatre I left Krya's apartment 3 hrs early to ensure time in case I took the wrong train (hey, it happens!). I walked up the subway stairs and wondered where to go now...until I saw a gigantic line of all sorts of different people weaving through New York's skyscrapers. This is it! Waiting for what seemed like hours in the cold rain, with no umbrella, I was overjoyed to enter the Theatre. There was a certain stillness in the air. Anticipation, excitement, and gratitude.

The stage was set up with a large beautiful banner on the back wall, a king-like throne in the middle, and twenty or so monks and lamas sitting and silently communicating. My heart was pounding as everyone stood up as H.H. entered. Gratitude filled my heart and my face grew wet with the excitement of the moment.

It has been a couple months now and ironically I don't remember the lecture as much as I remember the break. Break time came and it was still raining. I knew there had to be a Starbucks close because after all it is a city, so I headed to the nearest one to camp out for the hour. I sat down at the bar with my soy late and watched as a sea of orange robes flooded the streets of New York. It was beautiful. People's reaction to the monks were even more beautiful. Even though the monks did not speak english, I watched as strangers came up to them to ask questions and they communicated the nonverbal answers. The strangers that would have never even looked at another person on the street just came right up to them with no fear, only love and curiosity. It was like they were pulled in by a magnet. My theory is it was a magnet of love.

I know this because a group of five of the monks walked in to Starbucks and sat with me. Their energy and compassion was infectious. The moment they sat down, the monk next to me started a nonverbal conversion consisting of names, smiles, laughs, and nudges. He immediately offered me half his banana because he saw I had no food. I tried to say no thank you and that I already ate but he insisted I take it. True selflessness can be seen in even the most simple actions. As I sat with them I took notice of how people passing the window reacted to their presence. I saw smiles, some giggles, and even random people entering the Starbucks to introduce and talk with them like they were old friends. What a powerful gift that strangers feel automatically comfortable.

We laughed a bit more and then it was time to head back to the Theatre for round two. It was such an amazing sight to see those orange and red robes flooding Broadway. The energy was so pure and childlike. Even if I couldn't understand what H.H. was saying, I felt the impact all around and within me. I believe there is the foundation of love that connects all beings. In a city where the attitude is "eye for an eye", there is proof that the foundation is love. So even if it was just for that day, the streets of Broadway felt the affect of living in true compassion and love, coming closer to the ultimate goal of happiness together.